For a long time, I've been outwardly critical of romantic comedies:
- nothing ever actually happens this way,
- no man is like that,
- why is the wedding the happy ending when we know the first year of marriage is really hard?
And yet, every year, we (I'll implicate all of you since I KNOW other people watch them!) flock to the Christmas romantic comedies as one of the most telltale signs of the season. It doesn't matter if you canceled cable and no longer have access to all your favorite childhood stars in the Hallmark movies, pick a streaming service and there will be an abundance of Christmas-themed shows about a man and a woman finding love under the mistletoe on Christmas Eve.
We all have an explicit agreement that they are unrealistic and cheesy, and yet implicitly, we are drawn to watching them (if evidenced only by the fact they pump out new ones year after year).
Could it be that we want them to be true?
In Til We Have Faces, CS Lewis writes "It was when I was happiest that I longed most... And because it was beautiful, it set me longing, always longing. Somewhere else, there must be more of it."
What is the romcom storyline? The son of a business mogul, willing to give up his inheritance for love. A poor woman, unsure that she is worthy of love, longing to be freed from the slavery she finds herself in under her wicked cousin. (Think: Cinderella). This is our story.
Think about it. The whole storyline is this longing and yearning to at last realize that moment in which it all comes together, when that inkling we've felt reaches its conclusion and love at last feels solid and secure and permanent. All of the love interest's flaws become irrelevant or redeemed when they are at last loved by another. And to symbolize the commitment and permanence of this love, it all ends with a wedding. A marriage. A commitment.
This is us.
I am all too aware of my own flaws. All too self-conscious about the fact that the God of the Universe gave up his inheritance to come down and love me. All too undeserving. I spend my life wanting to believe it's true because I long to be loved like that. But I dodge my Bridegroom's love because I'm insecure. I am living in the middle of that romcom.
But the best is yet to come.
As I mentioned earlier, I've thought it was dangerous when fairy tales and chick flicks ended with a wedding. "It's so unrealistic!" But actually, isn't it more realistic than anything else? The Bible ends with a wedding. The wedding supper of the Lamb. In this wedding supper, the separation between Christ and the church are at long last OVER. It's the ending that we dream of... because it's the ending that is coming.
I used to think that chick flicks were dangerous. I thought they would set me up for disappointment. I thought they would take my mind to a place that reality could never deliver on. And this is all true if I'm looking for that in a man here on earth. Men on earth will never read my mind or pursue me as boldly, and if I think that being loved by one will rid me of my insecurity, I'm setting myself up for failure and disappointment... but that's because the love that is so imperfectly illustrated through the love of a man and woman here on earth is just a picture of the perfect love that God has for us.
"In this the love of God was made manifest among us, that God sent his only Son into the world, so that we might live through him. In this is love, not that we have loved God but that he loved us and sent his Son to be the propitiation for our sins." 1 John 4:9,10
As we start the advent season today, we start with Hope.
Friends... if you already have this hope in your life, reflect on it. Remember that all you long for is ultimately a longing for God, for something that is promised.
If you have never accepted the grace that Jesus extends, and have somehow read this far, I would invite you to examine your heart in this season. There is no doubt in my own mind that I long for something beyond myself. It is impossible to shake the knowledge that I am flawed. And yet there is a God who loved me so much and longed for a relationship with me and he freely gave his own Son to be reconciled to me. (Romans 5:8 "But God demonstrates his own love for us in this: while we were still sinners, Christ died for us.") I know that it's offensive for us to think we or others are sinners, and I'm not going to debate that point. I would just challenge you to think deeply and look deeply. Could it be true that you're longing to be loved despite all your flaws? To experience, in reality, what your heart rejoices at in the end of a chick flick? What if it IS true? This love, grace, relationship is a free gift offered to us if only we'll accept it.
And I saw the holy city, new Jerusalem, coming down out of heaven from God, prepared as a bride adorned for her husband. And I heard a loud voice from the throne saying "Behold, the dwelling place of God is with man. He will dwell with them, and they will be his people, and God himself will be with them as their God. He will wipe away every tear from their eyes, and death shall be no more, neither shall there be mourning, nor crying, nor pain anymore, for the former things have passed away. And he who was seated on the throne said, "Behold, I am making all things new." Also he said, "Write this down, for these words are trustworthy and true."
Revelation 21:2-5
